Click here to listen to this article.
Throughout my four years of college I liked a guy who didn’t like me back. I’m pretty sure he was unaware of my existence, let alone my obsession with him. I always looked for him on campus, trying to spot him in a crowd so I could gaze at his handsome face. Secretly, I hoped he would notice me, approach me, and initiate a relationship with me. I daydreamed about us falling in love and getting married.
Reality looked very different. He wasn’t mean or malicious toward me — but he wasn’t anything toward me. He simply didn’t see me, even though I deeply desired to be seen. Feeling overlooked by this guy — and discovering right after I graduated that he was engaged — was honestly one of the hardest things I’ve experienced.
It’s comforting to remember I’m not the only one who has felt this way. In fact, ever since sin entered the world, people have felt overlooked. One of the earliest examples is in the account of Hagar in Genesis 16.
Hagar was an Egyptian slave to Sarai, the wife of Abram. Despite her husband receiving a promise from the Lord that he would have countless descendants, Sarai acted in desperation and haste when she gave Hagar to Abram as a concubine. Since Hagar was Sarai’s slave, she probably had no say in the matter when her mistress told her she had to marry her mistress’ own husband. After marrying Abram, Hagar became pregnant with a son, prompting her to despise Sarai.
Things took an unexpected turn for Hagar when Sarai began to treat her with cruelty. Pregnant and alone, Hagar fled from Sarai into the wilderness. The angel of the Lord soon approached Hagar at a spring and asked about her journey. He told her to return to Sarai and promised she would have countless descendants, though her own son — to be named Ishmael — would live in hostility with others.
Hagar in turn addressed the angel of the Lord as “El Roi” and said to him, “‘…have I actually seen the one who sees me?’” (Genesis 16:13 CSB). In an article on Bible Study Tools, author Hope Bolinger points out that many names for God used in Scripture include “El” because “El” means “God.” But the specific name “El Roi” is used only in Genesis 16. In the original Hebrew, “Ro’iy” can be translated as “Shepherd” — one who gazes, looks or sees. Hagar named the spring where she had her encounter “Beer-lahai-roi,” translated “the well of the Living One who sees me.”
The story of Hagar is comforting because it assures us that the Lord sees our pain and suffering even when no one else does. However, it’s not just our hardships that He sees — He also sees our good works. This is one of the key themes in Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. As He cautions His listeners against practicing righteousness to get attention, He reminds them who sees their righteousness when no one else does: His Father.
There’s no need for us to seek praise from people for doing good things because El Roi sees every good thing we do — and His approval is enough. Let’s consider a few ways we can honor Him as we focus on this truth.
1. Give in secret
“‘Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. Otherwise, you have no reward with your Father in heaven. So whenever you give to the poor, don’t sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be applauded by people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. But when you give to the poor, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you’” (Matthew 6:1-4).
Giving isn’t something we should do to receive admiration from others but as a sacrifice of worship that our Father sees and values. He is pleased when we do generous acts in secret — when He’s the only one who knows about our benevolence. Anonymous generosity not only brings glory to the Lord, but it also brings joy to the giver and the receiver.
2. Pray in secret
“‘Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you’” (Matthew 6:5-6).
I don’t believe Jesus was telling his listeners they could never pray in public. Sometimes a public prayer is appropriate, like right before a meal at church or during a small group meeting. However, Jesus was telling his listeners to avoid praying in public to get attention or praise. Our simple, genuine prayers that no one but our Father hears are sweet prayers indeed.
3. Fast in secret
“‘Whenever you fast, don’t be gloomy like the hypocrites. For they disfigure their faces so that their fasting is obvious to people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that your fasting isn’t obvious to others but to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you’” (Matthew 6:16-18).
While there’s value in fasting with a group of people for a specific purpose, there’s also value in fasting as an individual without anyone else knowing. Making a show out of fasting — which should be a serious, sacred act — is disrespectful at best and defiant at worst. Just as our Father sees our sorrows and struggles, He also sees our worshipful sacrifice of food for the ultimate purpose of drawing closer to Him and seeking His will.
Guaranteed rewards
I completely understand the desire to be noticed. After all, I spent four years hoping a seemingly oblivious guy would notice me. But when he failed to see me, I learned a hard but necessary lesson: El Roi is the only one who truly sees me — and because He’s the only one who truly sees me, He’s the only one whose praise and admiration actually matter.
When we’re too concerned about receiving attention from others, we miss out on the opportunity to quietly and humbly worship El Roi — the God who sees us when no one else does. We also fail to fully appreciate what Jesus stated in each of the three passages above: “And your Father who sees in secret will reward you” (Matthew 6:4, 6, 18). The Lord doesn’t need us to announce our good deeds to the world or even mention them in conversation. Everything we do — including giving, praying and fasting — is more worthwhile when we focus on worshipping El Roi.
Copyright 2024 Grace McCready. All rights reserved.
